armor

I have been thinking about body armor. For men, they can bulk up, puff up their chests, physically become bigger and face the world from behind their armor. What about women? Besides getting fat or loud, what armor do we have?

In All About Lulu, the dad was a body builder, and I remember some line about him deflating at the end when he'd stopped body building. A friend's therapist proposed to her that she is letting herself be overweight to feel more like the mama bear. Strength in size.

What options do women have? In the corporate world a strong suit (of armor), an expensive handbag, pointy heels. What is their real purpose? To look good or to feel more powerful? The female body armor.

These thoughts have been coalescing following conversations about equal pay, strength in femininity, strength AND femininity, appropriate dress in the corporate world, female presidents, Nancy Pelosi dressing better than Hillary Clinton, tight shoulders in yoga from lifting weights, mate selection, woman valuing big tough over vulnerable, etc.

But, again, the main issue is not one of aesthetics (those are valuable on their own), but more about what's happening behind it all. The questions around being a woman, dressing as a woman, feminine, sexy in the right context, and having that be strength. Owning all of yourself.

I wonder if things may have turned out differently if the Indian girl had gotten on that bus without her boyfriend, how she may have been punished for self-identifying as a sexual being, how in so many places and for so many cultures, being a sexual woman is expected to be done in secret, perhaps in shame, if at all.

What can I do as a 5'6" woman? How can I create an illusion that I am bigger than I am? How do I show my strength and be taken seriously while still being a woman, dressing like a woman, not denying any aspect of my womanhood? At least I have crazy hair and a deeper voice.